When Pastor Jesse announced there were still openings for people to join an upcoming mission trip to Africa, I thought “What a great opportunity for Jon and I to serve the Lord together!” We immediately agreed to go to our first meeting that day so we could see “what it was all about” and then talk about it more afterwards. Our good friends Sean and Angela even volunteered to take care of our three children before we even knew if the trip was possible for us. The whole idea of going on a mission trip together was spur of the moment but we were trusting God to open doors if it was His will.
Now Jon only needed to do two things in order to be able to go. He needed to get approval from his boss at work and he needed to request 10 days off from a group called B-troop, a volunteer opportunity that he had committed to almost a year prior. The approval from work came easy, but B-troop just couldn’t change their schedule to work with the dates Jon needed off. We were both so broken hearted! It was obvious Jon couldn’t go, so I didn’t give it a second thought. I figured we’d just try again next time. But then Jon told me I should consider going without him. He said, “B-troop is my obstacle. Not yours.” Now if you know me well, you would know that I like to live in my very small comfort zone. Going on a mission trip with a group of people I barely knew at the time… to teach women and children who don’t speak english… about things they have never heard of before…in a country I had never been before…without my husband even there……THAT was DEFINITELY out of my comfort zone!
I prayed for God to give me a clear answer on whether I should go or not. I couldn’t imagine doing something so big without Jon right there beside me. But God spoke to my heart. From the beginning I believed that if it was God’s will, then He would send us…both. But I never once thought, what if He only sent one of us? God made me realize that if Jon and I were to go together, I would lean on him, instead of Him, to guide me through the trip, or to help me when i’m feeling lost, or to step up for me if I didn’t feel capable of doing something. So although my flesh was still unsure, I eventually decided on going without him. For days I kept thinking I have no idea what to expect or what I would be doing there, or if I would even be good at it if I did know. Needless to say, I had built up a lot of anxiety about going! But a couple days later, a wise man saw my anxious heart at church and said “You will have no idea what you are doing. Nobody will, not even them!” And that was my confirmation from God that this was going to happen and that I needed to go alone. After that, everything fell into place fast!
The last week before leaving was a blur and nothing seemed real until we finally landed in Ghana, Africa. I felt my comfort zone disappear and my anxiety was no longer there. I felt God’s love cover me and He gave me peace and excitement and wonder all at the same time. These feelings stayed with me for the next 10 days (maybe even longer!). Although I might have gotten nervous once or twice while teaching, I never once felt a restricting comfort zone or a pounding anxiety attack. I heard God speak loudly and clearly and I felt His presence among the people there every day! It was one of the most amazing blessings God has given me. I was able to see people come to Christ right before my eyes!! I was able to see others worship Him with passion and joy, and they had so much love within their hearts that they couldn’t help but share it with those around them. They had no comfort zones or anxiety about sharing God’s love and joy.
My heart will never be the same. I have fallen in love with everything about Africa, especially the women and children I now know and hope to see again soon. Because of this trip, God has renewed and filled my heart with even more love for Him. He has given me the confidence to continue to step out of my comfort zone in the future. I’ve always known blessings come in obedience, but this mission trip definitely opened my eyes to things I never knew I could be blessed with.
The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Deuteronomy 31:8
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